Monday, March 7, 2011

Tomorrow is a new day.

Today has been an emotional day, a wonderful morning, but an emotional day none the less..my heart and mind are a scattered mess... I've not yet discovered if it is better to wait until I'm more innerly sorted or to simply post what is on my heart right in the midst of the mess... here is the mess...
I am not superwoman.

The longer I am in this environment in which it is essential that I have some control over my emotions... the worse I get.. and the smaller control I have.

I'm fine, then out of nowhere, I can't breathe and the tears come up quick and there's no stopping it.

I hate this.

I hate this aspect of myself.

Finding the fine line, in having to suck it up and 'to do what I have to do' and yet, allowing myself to feel these emotions and letting others see me be vulnerable... the line is all but invisible. Is it there??

To find the line between letting others see.. but only the right others ... and sucking it up in front of the 'other' others...when I don't want anyone to see...at all... that I'm finding is impossible.

"It gets better with time".. I have found that to be a lie. I was much better at this before... with time I have simply less and less control.

Tonight.. simply put, I'm a mess. But... it is during this time that I am reminded.. the night won't last forever... surely it won't. As dark as it feels right now, with so many things going on in my life, the morning is on its way, and praise the Lord His mercies are new every morning!

Tomorrow is a new day.

~ To God Be the Glory!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yes, sweet girl, God's mercies are new every morning, and the morning is on it's way. AND, even when we are a mess; we are HIS mess and HE can and is glorified in the midst of our being a mess!

We are praying for you, your strength and protection...all the time~~~even when we are messies!!!!
(for I'm a mess sometimes, too; aren't we all?)


Love you tons!
momma

Anonymous said...

Love you friend! Praying for you tonight!